February 2018 Funny Stories

My neighbor, a handsome bachelor, recently attended his 60th class reunion in Pennsylvania. When he returned and paid me a visit, I asked, “How was it? I bet you were the youngest-looking classmate there.”

“I think I was,” he admitted, then said, “but my high school prom date was there, too, and she looked like my grandmother.”
Barbara Burke, Mesa, Arizona

A second-grader came home from school and told her mother and grandma, “Guess what? Today, I learned how to make babies!”

Shocked, mother and grandma exchanged looks. Keeping her cool, Mother said, “Well,
how DO you make babies?”

“It’s so simple,” her daughter replied. “You just change the ‘y’ to ‘i’ and add ‘es.’”
Penny Rafferty Hamilton, Granby

While studying birds, my daughter Kristin was explaining to her 6-year-old daughter the different types of feathers birds have. She had just finished explaining the down feathers when Anya looked up and asked, “So Mom, where are the ‘up’ feathers?”
Jim Skvorc, Dolores

My grandson and I go out to breakfast the second Saturday of every month. On one outing, the waitress asked for my order. I told her sausage and eggs over easy. My grandson said he would have bacon, eggs and toast. The waitress asked what kind of eggs he wanted. After several seconds of thought, he said, “Chicken.”
Joe and Ellen Luster, Loveland